The Man, The Myth... || The Jewel Thief

One of the harsh truths I’ve had to come to terms with this weekend is that I’m merely just smart, and may never be as cool as the Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton guys that are incredibly innovative, and brought about inventions like every other day. I saw this film(documentary), and I was awed at the sheer ingenuity, and sheer audacity of the guy in question. Remember the name: Blanchard.

The Jewel Thief (2023)

Imagine James Bond, but on the wrong side of the law. In fact, I believe that Gerald Blanchard would very well give James Bond a run for his money. This guy was a criminal mastermind from a teenage age, using a video recorder to record his actions. From crafty, little shoplifting acts, to full on bank robberies and even to stealing of a priceless jewel from an Austrian museum. It was clearly not about the money for Blanchard, as each successful heist merely fuelled his hunger and greed for even greater criminal acts. He was uncontrollable, and he knew it.

I’ve had this on my phone for about two and a half years or thereabout, and only found it cause I was doing a massive clean up and deletion process in my phone. I had to pause the clean up and sat back to be awed by this enigma of a man. What enthralled me the most? I don’t know, I think it’s the man himself.

First off, the video recordings and tapes. This man kept, from the age of fifteen or so, videos of every single action of his. Videos of his shoplifting. Videos of how much he was taking from the cash register. Everything was recorded and taped like he was planning a memoir. It’s like secretly, he knew he was preparing for the singular moment of when it would be made into a documentary. He was prepared, and just having the time of his life while he waited.

Second, his brain, maybe? Who stays for eight hours (no break in between) just monitoring a cash register, so he could understand its mechanism, and steal from it the following night, or watch the construction of a bank for six months, so he can find out how the ATM machines are being constructed, draft out the entire blue print of the bank, and take out all the money from it to the tune of three quarters of a million dollars the night before its grand opening? It’s unbelievable.

Third, the audacity! I cannot emphasize enough how awed I was by the audacity of this guy. Every time I thought, “No, surely he can’t be that audacious? Surely he can’t think he will get away with something like this?” he did yet another even worse crime. And was always getting away it! Laying out all his plans on the phone even though he knew his phone was bugged, and the cops were listening in. The list is endless. There was a valid statement made by Blanchard himself who committed most of these crimes in Canada. He said that he knew that if he did half of these crimes in the United States, he would have been sentenced to life imprisonment spanning 160 years, at the very least.

I’m not sure how the direction involved in documentaries is supposed to work, unless I may have had a few criticisms, but I genuinely think the direction was executed perfectly, and they couldn’t have possibly made it any intriguing or exciting than how it was. I think my only issue would be in the title. He stole just one jewel, guys. It was not enough to title the documentary as The Jewel Thief. His other heists especially with the banks were way more impressive, and more worthy of note than the stealing of the jewel, in my opinion. So yeah, wrong titling.

I was hooked from start to finish by The Man, The Myth and The Legend that is Gerald Blanchard. This man is fundamentally unwell, and the ending to it all kind of shocked me. It’s crazy how the world is actually more laid back than you would expect when it comes to retributions for a person like Blanchard. Or maybe he was just in the wrong country. Who knows? Either way, this was an excellent way to end my weekend, and I’m glad I got to behold this non-fictional, cinematic masterpiece, which you’re clearly missing out on if you haven’t seen it. An 8/10 for me. It doesn’t get any better.

Jhymi🖤

_{Thumbnail from IMDB.
Other images are film screenshots.}

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